I work for Enterprise

I work for Enterprise.

I have advanced degree in Accounting, Public Relations, Marketing, Business, Computer Science, Civil Engineering, Auto Propulsion, and Swahili.

Of course, I have the reservation that you booked six years ago even though you don't have the confirmation number and you think that it was under a name that starts with and "X".

Its not a problem for me to give you a 12 passenger, non-smoking, convertible hatchback, sports car with six doors. All front row seating, and yes, I can install a turbocharger. I know it is my fault that we don't have one with purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am expected to speak all languages. It is obvious to me that when you booked your reservation for Friday that you really meant Saturday. My company has entrusted me with all financial information and decisions and yes, I can tell you why your bill from March of 1987 contained a $2.00 gas charge because obviously you never pay for gas charges.

I work for Enterprise. I understand that I am beneath you and anything you say surely was passed down from The Almighty Himself. And I understand that you are far to busy to stop for 2 seconds so I can print your receipt. And of course I will fax it to you while you try to sputter your fax number as you jump onto the shuttle. And if you give me the wrong number and get it right away, I apologize, I should have known the number by heart.

I understand that McGulicutty's Widget Manufacturing is a vast empire that will make or break our company. Yes, I am lying to you when I say we have no more cars available. It is not a problem for me to quickly assemble several more cars. this time I will not forget the purple leather seats.

I work for Enterprise. I am quite capable of checking three contracts in, two contracts out, taking 5 reservations, answering fifteen incoming calls and changing the oil in that blue Camry, all at the same time.

I always know where to find the best vegetarian-Kosher-Mongolian barbeque restaurants. I know exactly what to see and do in Denver in fifteen minutes without spending any money. I take personal blame for airline food, traffic jams, dirty hotel rooms and the National Economy. I understand that your bad day or your accident, or broken down car are entirely my fault. I realize that you meant to book your reservation here. People often confuse us with the "Turkeylurkey Dogsled Rental of the Northern Artic Circle." Of course I can "fit you in" and yes, you may have the special one dollar rat because you are affiliated with the Hoboken Accounting and Bagel Club.

I am expected to smile, empathize, sympathize, console, upsell, downsell (and of course, know when to do which), perform, sing, dance and fix the printer.

I work for Enterprise.